Free funny phone messages

Beat me eat me bite my bum,
whip me strip me make me cum,
suck me fuck me and lick me out,
then tickle my nipples until I shout!

Ive been a muff diver 4many a year.
Ive spent all my money on muff divin gear,
the goggles,
the snorkle the muffdivin tank.
If im not out muff divin,
im havin a wank

Roses are red,
voilets are corny,
when i think of you babes it makes me so HORNY!!!

Hickory,
dickory,
dock,
dis bitch woz suckin me cock,
da clock struck 2,
i dumped me goo,& dropped her at da end of da block!

I want you right,
right now,
why don't you come on over and let's do now!

Love is a name,
Sex is a game.
Forget the name and play the game!

wife to husband :
doctor adviced me for bed rest 1 month in a beautiful foreign country
so where we will go ?

Husband : we will go to a new doctor.